How Do Koreans Exercise?

As you live your day to day lifestyles, I am sure that you find yourselves wondering what a Korean fitness class may be like. You are in luck, for today I will describe to you my first encounter with a Korean spinning class.

Back in the day and in the little parts of Wooster, Ohio, I was an avid "spinner." For those of you who are unclear as to what this pastime consists of, it is essentially riding a stationary bicycle at an intense pace for a specified amount of time. I cannot clearly recall my method of thinking, but I loved to exercise in any form that I could. Spinning and kickboxing classes were my ultimate favorites. Since my university days, I have not tortured myself in such a fashion. My gym provides spinning for its members and well...I suppose "the curiosity killed the cat," for I wanted to find out how on earth they do it over here. God have mercy on my soul.

So I, a creature with orange hair and white skin who appears as though I have never gotten a kiss of sunlight, lurked into the room where spinning is conducted. Of course I do not speak the language so I just smiled and hopped on a two-wheeled devil. An array of souls filled up the class, low and behold, I was not the only foreigner. A small and very serious looking spinner man with a decorative rainbow tattoo on his leg shimmied his way onto a bike about two away from where I was stationed. The lights cut out, the multi-colored disco began to flash and 'oh shoot, here we go!' I thought.

The bass began to boom at an increasingly rapid pace and the lyrics were a complete mystery to me. All of a sudden, I had drawn the perfect parallel. My feet were peddling to the max but I felt as though I were at a rave club in the middle of an unknown (but still Asian) land. The words of the instructor befuddled me as well, but I can take a fitness class in any tongue because all you have to do is watch the limbs of fellow classmates. The weekend prior to this Monday evening, I attended a concert of one of my favorite electronic dj's of all time, Benny Benassi. From the concert, I still had a hot pink glow bracelet in my freezer at home. I really wish somebody would have let me know to bring it to the gym that night.

The instructor was a hoot and was certainly the star of the show on his bike elevated above the rest of us. He knew every word to every song and he had some serious swivel hips as he shook it to the beat without a bead of perspiration. I anticipated glitter, whistles and angel dust to flutter down from the disco ball. We just kept peddling and peddling and all of a sudden, the cool down was upon us. The class got off of the bikes and then the instructor had us doing stretches that I have only seen middle-aged, Korean men and women do. The first of these "Korean stretches" are to place both hands on the waist and move the waist in a circular motion. The second stretch is to hunker down in an almost-squat position and then bounce on the knee caps...to keep them limber or something perhaps. I really have no idea what either of these Korean stretches do, but try them sometime and let me know.

All in all, that was a hilarious Korean experience. That being said, I'm ready to mount the bike again next Monday night at 8 p.m.

Mexico Meets Korea...y Dice Queeee?

If you are not aware, I had my first visitor last weekend!!! Of course, it was no other than my lovely friend Jonathan from Monterrey, Mexico! Approximately two weeks prior to our overdue rendezvous (it had been about seven months), Jon contacted me to let me know that he was headed my way to attend expositions in both Tokyo and Seoul pertinent to his family business. After chatting with Jon while he was in Tokyo, it was apparent that he had already developed a disdain for the abundance of rice in the East and small amount of English spoken. He got into Seoul on Thursday afternoon and got extremely lost in taxis while searching for the exposition (per my directions and the extreme language barrier). After Jon's Korean escapades all over the city, I found one of my favorite people in the mundo passed out in the dark on my bed when I got home from work. It was then that I knew all was right with the world.

Jon and I had tons to discuss as we galloped out of the J-Castle (my apartment building...full name: "The House of the Lord") to feast on scrumptious Korean style nachos, burritos and quesadillas at Dos Tacos. We were like lost Chihuahua puppies trying to find any morsel that hinted at similarities to our comfortable Mexican surroundings. On Friday, Jon and I left The House of the Lord to pursue our livelihoods (mine: 6 months left and counting).

Friday night was the first night I had ever been to Outback Steakhouse in Korea! I had been craving one of their salads (and to balance it out, we had a "Bloomin' Onion") for the longest time. We met up with my co-workers Carly and Sue. It was a big night out to dinner and was topped off with watching season 5 episodes of The Office for Kindergarten graduation ceremonies followed bright and early on Saturday morning. To this day, I am so thankful for Jon's timely visit because I had my own personal photographer at graduation! I have included a video taken by Jon of my baby Armadillos. Please pay special attention to Sally Cho (the pee-er) and her lack of interest in our performance. I made the costumes myself and I plan to add it to my resume so employers flock to me upon my return.

After the ceremony and dance performances, we all went to lunch together and then Jon and I peeled out in a cab to get home and watch The Office with Jon's mimosa-like concoctions. I cannot get enough of the top American drama and I am so thankful that my visitor a) brought the show and b) shares the same enthusiasm...we quoted it almost all day, everyday... even as we went souvenir shopping and sightseeing at the Seoul Tower, the highest point in the city and a large tourist attraction. As we hustled to the top (via cable car of course), I reminded Jonathan of Ariel rushing with Flounder and the barrels of oil to crash the wedding before sunset. We were able to strategically place ourselves at the tower before sunset
and made it just in time for the spectacular view.

After the awesome weekend, Jonathan had to leave for Mexico and I had to resume my Korean life and return to being a kindergarten teacher.

'Six months.' Inhale... exhale.

Dating in Korea.

What Valentine's Day means to me:

1.) Chocolate. Be it chocolate from my mom, a stalker, my dog, I don't care who you are. I love chocolate. Extra points for the chocolate that also incorporates peanut butter (and yes, Salmonella).

2.) Tin Foil Boxes. I miss these. From Kindergarten through 6th grade, I had a sparkled-out box each year with the coolest decorations. Valentine's Day in 7th grade was just not the same.

3.) A [Strawberry] Margarita. 'Tis the season. Why not?

What Valentine's Day does NOT mean to me:

1.) Going on a date in Korea...

2.) With a Korean....

3.) Who doesn't speak English...

4.) And comes bearing me gifts.

Ok, so I never wanted to do in this. I had (/have) a crippling fear. Then on Valentine's Day, I did it. I went on a date with a man-purse carrying Korean. Allow me to start from the beginning.

My mother told me that meeting men at bars was a poor decision...and it is and it has been and I don't know why I never learn. I was out two weekends ago with my friend Miranda. Miranda is living in Seoul and is from South Africa. We share the same blunt disposition and slight distaste for teaching English as a Foreign Language. That being said, we bond over an occasional, yet necessary, cocktail on the weekends. We live in the Hongdae area with an array of restaurants, boutiques, bars and art shops. The venue we found ourselves inside is named Tin Pan II. Just the name alone wreaks of class. Now, this establishment serves food, so when I told my mom that I met my Valentine (in all seriousness) at a restaurant, I wasn't lying.

Later into the evening, I met Kyo Ho. A small chit chat had transpired and Kyo Ho apparently thought we were soul mates. We went our separate ways, however the texts began to flow the next day and consisted of:

"hi, last night i meet. what are you doing?"

"where are you? ^^"

"*..*..*..*..*..*..*..* good luck~today~~"

"g n
o i
o g
d h
t~~"

Ugh.

After a week of this nonsense, my three, one-word answer responses did not dissolve the relationship. I agreed to go to dinner and a movie to make sure it was a "no-go" and to conduct a brief sociological experiment regarding Korean dating behavior. You may call me cruel...and you may not be far from the truth, but I've always been a curious kid.

As Kyo Ho left to pick me up, I recieved a text "You house. I start." It's all good, I can translate Konglish, little did I know, it was going to be an entire night of Konglish. He arrived and we went to dinner. From what I understood, Kyo Ho only eats Korean food for every meal, everyday, so having a chicken salad and pizza for dinner was very kind and considerate of him. During dinner, he asked me for my cell phone. My palms got sweaty. Alas, he pulled out a cell phone charm and put it on my phone. I now have a dangly hot pink lip gloss hanging from my cell phone. Whew, just a gift. Not long after the charm, he pulled out a small blue box from his man purse. I felt really bad...and I still feel really bad for writing about this, but it's all part of my Korean experience and I'm positive you want to hear about it. In the blue box was a small and simple black-banded watch with Roman-numeral numbers. I really like it and I would have picked it out myself actually. Maybe I am speaking too soon and our love will truly blossom.

Anyway, after dinner, we high-tailed it in his tan Hyundai Santa Fe to a movie theatre near my house. I must say that I really wanted to see Benjamin Button...partially why I accepted to go on this date. The movie began at 12:30 and I had no idea it was a three-hour long flick. Ugh. After awkward and failed hand-caressing attempts, Kyo Ho started to snore. Yeah, so throw me in a date-scenario where we cannot communicate and then have him try to touch my hands mid-movie and then have him saw wood so the Koreans around us stare. I wanted to run out of the emergency exits, but I was also on the edge of my seat and wanted to know what was going to happen to Benjamin Button.

The movie finally ended, we traipsed out of the theatre into a night of flurries and I wanted to get the heck back home into my bed. During the whole ride home, I was thinking about what a fantastic blog entry Kyo Ho had just given me. I will not go insofar as to make a generalization about all courting in Korea (has a ring to it) and should probably remain open to future potential experiments (alas, I'm still a bit shaken up).

In conclusion, it seems as though most Koreans date Koreans. Mixed-race relationships are most common amongst American military personnel (men) and Korean women. It is generally not the individuals in the relationship who receive the criticisms of society, as much as the children who are comprised of multiple ethnicities. In terms of various societal aspects, I view Korea as being about 50 years behind what I am used to in the states. Koreans acknowledge a divide between black and white Americans. Even young students in the school that I teach say that they do not like President Obama. It is obvious that at such a young and inexperienced age, they have nothing to base the claim on and the probability that such a notion has been perpetuated by their parents and older generations is great.

That being said, the special ones who like white girls go to Tin Pan II. ^^

Happy Chinese New Year...from Korea!

Greetings and Salutations!

I hope everyone is in good spirits and recovered from inauguration-related fiestas that I only had the pleasure of reading about from afar :) Due to Facebook updates and e-mails from friends in the District, the Latino Gala held in Union Station looked entirely delightful. Heck, J. Lo, Marc Anthony and an array of other spectacular Latinos under one roof sounded like heaven to me, this adopted Latina, shivering in the relentless Korean wind.

Anyway, everything is going very well on my side of the pond. An entire four-day weekend awaits me as the Lunar (or Chinese) New Year is a significant holiday in Eastern cultures. I hope to finish a book I am reading, which is entitled The Geography of Thought, by Richard E. Nisbett. My friend, Won, gave it to me for Christmas, most likely because I ask him why Koreans do what they do. The main idea of the book is that Easterners have a more cyclical method of thought and believe that everything is interconnected. Westerners are seen as making the assumption that we are ultimately in charge of our own destiny and oftentimes do not tie occurances to pre-cursors, for we categorize single events. This book has given me much more insight of Korean culture and helps me understand specific differences between our ways of thinking and perception.

At work (or school), all of the kindergarten students dressed up in their Hanbok, which is traditional Korean clothing. My little Korean babies were so cute in their traditional garb! I seriously need to get a life because even when I am not at work and hanging out with my friends (fellow teachers....which may be part of the problem), we only talk about our students. We discuss what their future professions will be, how they treat other students, who the popular ones are, who has crushes on who and we even pinpoint random Koreans on the metro as future "Mickeys," "Kevins," or "Jinas." Even as I sit at my desk right now, I am able to count five stickers on my clothes from the day's events. In not too long, I am to go out and meet a friend for a glass of wine and thank goodness I caught my animae character, pink cupcake, fuzzy penguin, "Coffee Break," blue fish stickers on my cardigan sweater and a rice particle in my hair. If my neighborhood crowd (I live in a trendy, university area) caught me traipsing out in such a state, I would certainly be shunned and sent back to the local chapter for Soccer Moms.

The weather eased up a bit during this week, but temperatures plummeted yet again today. Yesterday felt so close to spring and then as it always does, reality socked me in the face and caught me on the day I did not wear my gloves to warm my little dedos (fingers). The fellow inhabitants of my apartment building (three other teachers) all had sky high gas bills this month for the increased usage of heat. Oddly enough, my bill has remained at a zero balance ever since I have lived in Korea. I must say that I do shower, heat my apartment and whip up the occassional quesadilla and so I zip my lips avoid all eye contact when the subject arises.

Our building manager is probably my favorite character in all of Korea. He and I have an amiable relationship and if it is that which has been affected my gas bill, so be it, it is survival of the fittest my friends. Mr. Chu is such a bubbly man and he speaks English, so by default, we hit if off. By friends, he is referred to merely as "Chu," and by fellow teachers and myself, "Dragon Breath." After Chu was fixing Greg from Toronto's sink, Greg bestowed upon Chu a bottle of soju (Korean liquor) in grattitude. Immediately after seventy-year-old Chu received the gift, he opened it and took a five-second swig. Ever since this instance, when I run into Chu, he wreaks of soju. That being said, our dear building manager has been coined "Dragon Breath."

I would like to end this entry on a positive note, so I have added a piece of work by my little songbirds, their latest version of Nobody by the Wonder Girls. (The actual video may be found at http://kr.youtube.com/watch?v=YpcxPS-JWv0). We are still tweaking our altos and sopranos, but I wanted to give you all a glimpse of what we do at lunch time.

I hope everyone has a tremendous weekend!

Warmest Wishes for 2009 from Seoul

I would like to wish everyone a Happy, Healthy and Prosperous 2009! In contrast to my previous two New Years spent in Monterrey, Mexico, this one was a bit different to say the least. This is the first year in three years that my dear friend Jonathan Guerrero Zavala was not in the mix. Replacing our tradition of vodka concoctions, Jonathan's Mexican dancing antics, breaking Rose de Reyes bread and Tacos(!) was soju, crazy Koreans in "2009" glasses and a early morning feast of sweet potato French fries and hot dogs. I certainly prefer the former.

Regardless of the differences between celebrating the New Year in the West versus the East, it has been a time of reflection and re-evaluation. I thought about how I ended up in Asia via an incredibly random chain of events (I mean Hello, I was supposed to move to D.C. to be close to my friends or to Mexico to live the...er My "Mexican Dream"). Although it is rare when I sit and consider all that I am grateful for and what has been accomplished in my life, I had the chance at the beginning of this year. My family is wonderful and pretty hilarious, but I have been so fortunate with all they have provided for me, particularly their support. Half of the opportunities I've had in my life by the age of 22 were never in the reach of my parents when they were young. I would also be at a loss without my sister, Rachel, and brother, Chris. We have an excellent relationship between all of us...as long as Rachel and I are not sharing a bed room over the summer where our "A" and "B" type personalities collide.

Our family holds a video chat at about 9 p.m. EST each Saturday evening. We chat about everything from hot local issues (generally involving tax levies, pipelines and Wooster FINALLY getting something so basic as Panera Bread) to what delicious morsels they grazed on at the Denbow Family Christmas. Rachel and Chris missed me so much this year that they cropped me into a photo from the soiree including them and Cousin Curt. My grandparents are getting older and now rather than hosting our family Christmas at their home, they have it in the basement of their church. That place is as cold as the dickens, referred to as "The Dungeon" by some, but it's always nice to see our family and discuss how we have grown so fast and yes, we (the kids) can drive cars now.
The Christmas party at school was the epitome of chaos. I swear, after each "party," I thank the Lord on High that it is a one year contract. Toward the end of the day, "Santa" came bearing gifts for the students. The documentation of this event is as follows: At this point, I about had it and was so close to signing my name on the bottom line for a hysterectomy. Rex landed a bloody nose about five minutes before the photo, hence the tissue stuffed in his left nostril. Denis rocked the Yuletide cheer by throwing up a peace sign, although the classroom had reached the absolute threshold of hell because during our "party," Amy threw a toy car at Sarah's eye. Teddy is in love with Sarah so he voiced his disdain for Amy (similar to the NASA love triangle). I'm happy to say that families with nine children are uncommon in middle-class, Western societies, which gives me hope.

The break from teaching Armadillo Class was a godsend. I finally got my hair cut and had to do so because my brother, Chris, repeatedly referred to me as having "Charlie Manson" hair when he saw me on the web cam. Two friends and I spent Christmas Day in watching National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation, Home Alone and Napoleon Dynamite. It was so nice to catch up on some classic film. Well, as for everyone else, it's not all play. Hopefully, I will feel refreshed as I return to teach more of the alphabet and not wish that I had booked a one-way and fled in the middle of Christmas night. You must understand that Korea is great, however teaching Kindergarten to nine screaming children is not my calling. I am not Mother Theresa.

I send my best wishes to you all and wish you the best in the upcoming year!

Feliz Navidad!

FELIZ NAVIDAD hasta el otro lado del mundo!!!! I hope that everyone had a spectacular Christmas! (In reference to the photo, this is how Korea celebrates Christmas).

A Season Sprinkled with Cheer

I hope I am finding everyone in good spirits amidst this holiday season :) I'm sure the malls and storefronts are decked out to the max. However, I hope that the "Heck, I don't care what I get him/her, I just need something in a box and with a bow!" vision that dances in our heads (yes...like sugar plums) has been postponed, until about the 24th.

Although I did toy with the notion of returning to the states to gather my gifts with haste beneath our fake pine (pre-lit, of course) in little Wooster, reality kicked in. I have only eleven days off of work and do not want to spend $2,000. Nonetheless, I have a hair appointment made on the 26th and think that is the perfect way to my spend Boxing Day (Canada). I plan to lay like a sloth in my bed and watch Yuletide movies while wearing my pajama pants made of a fleece fabric covered in presents. Last night, I snuggled up and watched The Polar Express, it almost made me believe in Santa Clause again...even though I made the naughty list when I fought my sister for the dvd and yanked it from her white-knuckled, kung-fu grip while packing my bags (sorry Rach).

Just about a week ago, my friend, Darcie and I spent a Sunday afternoon in making Christmas cards for fellow teachers and family at home. Through the duration of Love Actually and Elf and a corn and cheese pizza (odd and Korean, yet delicious), we knocked out our Christmas correspondence!

The new teacher from Toronto, Greg, and I took an adventure to the ritzy area of Seoul last weekend, Apgujeong. In this blog entry are several photos of stores and interesting sightings in the area. Due to my bulging salary and the exchange rate that gets worse by the day, I was able to pace myself in my purchases.

I have had a few holiday surprises already this season. First of which, one of my new students is a frequent pee-er. As I helped dear Sally change out of her urine-soaked knickers, I reconsidered all of the twists and turns in my life and wondered 'Why me?' A second surprise was that my newly ordered light pink, fitted sheet for my new bed blew off of my roof top clothes line as it was drying. The floor of our roof is scum, hence my new sheet was stained for life and so I had to toss it. The third holiday surprise must be my favorite, just wait. As I was laying like an infant and asleep by at about 9 p.m., my obnoxious Korean cell phone awoke me at 11:30 p.m. If only I had my retainer in that night, I would not have answered. Jehan, who I dated over the summer, had called me from Karachi, Pakistan. He is from Pakistan and is spending Eid with his mother and working on business accounts for a couple of weeks. He called to tell me that his mother had taken him to meet a potential bride and he thinks he's going to be engaged in a couple of days, and married in a couple of months, obviously. He requested my best wishes, as I was groggy and still half-asleep. I wished Jehanzeb the best, thought a little more about if my parents ever were to pick out my mate for life, craved some 'nog, and then passed out again (in my present pants).

I hope everyone is having a wonderful holiday season (packed with joyous surprises like mine!)