Samsung Boys

Korean men. I have sworn to myself up and down that I will not prance home with a Korean man in tow, feel free to peruse my following explanation:

*Take note that I love my two Korean boys, Nam Wang and Kookno Lee, very deeply. None of the following text applies to my boys, for they are perfect in every sense.

**Although politically incorrect, my friends and I refer to the young Korean adult male populace as "Samsung boys." We reside in a society of vast homogeneity. We are still relatively new to the area and all places/people/text look the same. Please excuse this misstep and do keep in mind that humor is what salvages me from the occasional moments of disillusion.


I go to my neighborhood gym, BR, generally in mornings. After finishing my time on the elliptical trainer this morning, I decided to hop on the bike and peddle it out for a bit. Directly in front of the bikes are treadmills, each with personal televisions. A Samsung boy was walking on a treadmill and watching what initially appeared to be a sports broadcasting show. There was a brightly colored colored desk (like they have on Sports Center) with two announcers on the left hand side. It differed slightly from Sports Center being that on the right side, there was an avid "gamer" battling it out on a computer. Yes my friends, there is a gaming channel on the Korean cable network. In essence, you sit and watch a sleep deprived Korean with dark-framed spectacles (so popular over here) and a CamelBack filled with Mountain Dew hash it out on screen . The cameras pan from the two announcers describing his moves play-by-play to the actual game screen itself. This must be a hit among the Samsung boys...hot.

I hate the man purse. Nothing is worse than a decent looking [straight] man traipsing around with a purse. The young men of Korea aspire for nothing less than to appear as though they belong on the cover of GQ. I am certainly game for admiring a nice pair of jeans on a guy from afar, but it's another story when the shirt cuffs must match the shoes, man purse and belt. For various reasons, I have concurred that the "man's man" does not live in Korea. Men's dress suits also have a hint of metallic over here. On the first day, I wanted to know why all of the men wore damn sparkle suits. The contrast of fashion has been addressed in conversation with my American friends and one of them prefers the "slightly feminine" male fashion sense. I am not progressive enough and do not like guessing games, I want men to dress as men.

Now, although I may not be blatantly peeking at the older generation of men over here (these are not Samsung boys...we're talking 60's +....the BINGO players), I think they have lost all sense of sight. The elders love to pair striped blazers with plaid dress shirts and then maybe top it off with a pair of preppy seersucker trousers. The conflicting patterns and colors distress me on a daily basis. I can't handle it. Are they blind?!?!

Short-sleeved dress shirts and skinny ties. I have a disdain for short-sleeved dress shirts...like is it really that hot outside? Can you seriously not suck it up and roll with full sleeves? I would prefer for them even to roll up the cuffs only if absolutely necessary . Those shirts remind me of the Wonder Years and the Brady Bunch, I just hate old stuff like that. The skinny tie...hm why are some Samsung boys still wearing their "training ties" from first communions? Get rid of them.

Highlights of this post: I have a serious distaste for: men who watch video gamers for pure enjoyment, wear man purses, sparkle suits, short-sleeved dress shirts and skinny ties. I have relayed my rant and if you catch yourself breaching any of my preferences, please plan for an alteration of your lifestyle prior to August 25, 2009 (kidding....but like seriously, think about it).